4 Years!

Well Insiders,

I don’t know how my boyfriend has done it. However we have reached the bench mark of 4 years! How AMAZING is that?! Its crazy! It really doesn’t feel as though its been as long as that! – I guess thats a good thing.

Im sure I’ve mentioned previously that we’ve been best friends for like 8 years now. Half of that time we have been together! I can honestly say that I don’t know what I would do without him in my life. He’s always been there for me, especially now that I’m going through all this emotional sh**. He’s not been scared off at all, when most would. He’s an amazing human being.

Our anniversary is smack bang in the middle of January. This is a little annoying as we have just had Christmas and our employer pays early in December for late Christmas shopping. This is great but means everyone is living on rations for the rest of the month until January pay day. SO LONG. Anyway, with our anniversary being in the middle of January it means that we decide to have a lovely, cozy day/night in.

This year was by far the best anniversary for me. – No, no ring Insiders, I bet thats what all of you were thinking, but nope, not yet! You’ll all be the first to know when that happens! I’ll tell you what though! It’s super annoying when people ask how long me and my boyfriend have been together and everyone says ‘Ooh, no ring yet?!’ – I just want to scream in their faces, ‘NO and it doesn’t matter! A ring doesn’t mean he loves me any less! – Not to mention we are only just into our 20s!’. Its crazy how so many people think its important to have a ring to just symbolise their love. Im definitely not against marriage or anything like that – I’d be thrilled however, I think its rude saying that kind of thing to others when you don’t know what their situation is or if they are even ready.. 

Anyway… Mini rant over…

We had both booked the day off work and had the whole day together watching Disney films. I made him breakfast, which wasn’t a total disaster. The fire alarm went off but other than that it went off without a hitch! – We then retired to the snug and watched LOADS of Disney films, with chocolates/sweets. I know, I know, how old are we? I believe that your never to old for Disney! No matter how old you are, you’ll always be able to be cheered up by a Disney/Pixar film. – If you don’t agree, you can bibbidi bobbidi back hell off my blog (just kidding or am I….?!). He then went to make dinner – My favourite! Sausage, mash and beans. YUM!! – this wasn’t a romantic dinner, as it did get crashed by my mum and dad. THANKS GUYS! (not). 

We both agreed on no presents this year as we were both struggling for money after Christmas. All we said was cards. I’m not going to lie, cards are my favourite part of any celebration. My boyfriend is the soppiest person in the world and writes the most amazing things to me. All about how much he loves me. To me, this means more than any present as he has spent time to think and write lovely things to me. – Such a CUTIE!

Gosh I LOVE HIM. – I’d be so lost without him.

Much Love,

The Insider x 


Drifting Away …

Dear Insider

I feel as though me and my bestfriend are drifting apart. She’s recently got a new boyfriend and seems to be spending all her time with him. She’s changing and I hate whats she’s changing into. I hate her boyfriend too. Which can make things awkward.

Can you help me at all? Would like some advise on how to get through this.


Megan xx


Hi Megan,

Ooo tough one. I guess, what you need to do is be honest with your bestie. There is no reason as to why you can’t be honest with your feelings. I know for a fact that if my bestie needed to say something – I would want her to be honest and tell me, no matter if it hurts or not. 

Its one of those conversations that horrible to have, but nothing will get better unless you talk to her about it. 

Not liking the boyfriend. I myself have experienced this. One of my old friends from school is dating a right ‘Idiot’ (putting it nicely) – and I can’t stand him. This has in a way drove me and that friend apart but that’s only because I couldn’t stand to be around him and I didn’t tell her how I felt. If you and you bestie are close, then I really suggest telling her how you feel about him. There is nothing worse than keeping something locked up especially when you’re going to be in situations when you’re going to have to be in close proximity with him. If its uncomfortable, remove yourself from the equation. 

Just be honest with your friend. Say: ‘I know you much you like this guy, but I don’t. As long as your happy then so am I. However I only want to hang around you (not him as well)’ – If you’re really besties with this girl she will understand and accept how you feel. 

Honest is the best policy! 

Much Love,

The Insider x 

Hair Dye

Hey there my lovely Insiders!

I was sitting around my room the other day and was thinking that I wanted a change. (This is never a good thing – I’m so unpredictable). What I decided to do, out of the blue is dye my hair. Whenever I say this my boyfriend rolls his eyes and says ‘Are you sure you want to do this? – Everytime you go back to brown you hate it and book in with your hairdresser and pay hundreds of pounds to go back to blonde’ – Blah Blah Blah.

Im the type of person that once I have something in my head, nothing will stop me from doing it. – Im such a strong minded person haha. I walked straight into Boots with this idea in mind. I went striding in, ready to get my normal brand and colour. To my amazement they didn’t have any. My heart sank a little. I really wanted to change my hair. Gutted I started to look at the other brands to see if any of them looked as good or if I could remember using any of the others before. I came across a fairly known hair dye brand and thought that I would give it a go. I always buy 2. Any girl that box dyes her hair knows that you always need a 2nd box just in case. You don’t want to get half way through and realise that because your hair is so long you’ve ran out or heaven forbid you miss patches of your hair! ALWAYS BUY A SECOND BOX!

Anyway I had ombre hair. I had bleach blonde hair on my tips and mousey brown roots. It looked rather nice and considering it cost me around £110 I liked it. However I really wanted a change. I picked up 2 boxes of dark/black hair dye and started to dye my hair. My poor boyfriend, I make him help me. I can’t do the back of my hair and I’m forever scared that I’ll miss pieces. He will be standing pouring the colour onto my head and also helping me section my hair to get the best coverage! – BEST BOYFRIEND EVER! – Top browny points!

He does always moan at me though. Whenever I dye my hair, its never done smoothly or carefully. I always seem to make the biggest mess ever. Honestly, it will get all over the floor, the walls, the table, the mirror, the sink, my clothes and not to mention all over my face/shoulders/arms. It looks like a bomb of hair dye had exploded! – He always drags me into the bathroom now because I’ve managed to get hair dye on his floor a couple of times… Oops!

The first box did a very good job especially as I haven’t used this brand before! Impressed I washed out the colour and dried my hair. I went to sleep feeling fabulous!

I woke up the next morning and started getting ready for work. As I sat down at my desk prepping my face I could see light brown strips though my hair. In complete shock, I scrambled to get my brush and started pulling at my hair. I couldn’t believe my eyes. I had missed chunks of my hair. – Mentally I was screaming inside. I had to go to work with patchy hair. I immediately woke my boyfriend up in a panic asking him if he could notice it. He couldn’t but I could. I felt so self conscious about it. I was walking around work with my hair up hoping that people wouldn’t be able to see the patches. – I felt so relieved that the only comments I got was ‘OMG, I love your hair’ ‘Your hair looks amazing dark’ – I was so happy!

I got home that night and got the second box I had on my table and reapplied another colour on top. This time I made sure that I didn’t miss a single layer of hair.

Insiders, if you dye your hair please remember to have at least another box of hair dye on standby just incase you have any issues the first time round. You don’t want to have a bad hair day like me.

Much Love,

The Insider x


I Lava You x

I LOVE MY BOYFRIEND. I’ve been with him for almost 4 years now. It feels like I’ve known him my whole life. I think I was around 12/13 years old when I met him – I know right, he has known me through my ugly duckling stages! The days in which my eyebrows didn’t match! – Honestly I don’t know what the hell he saw in me.

Clearly I haven’t been with him all this time, I’ve had previous boyfriends and he’s had a previous girlfriend. My old boyfriends would get annoyed and jealous of my now boyfriend as I would always be talking to him, talking about him (Me being the innocent person I was, didn’t realise this looked bad). However, I would get so jealous when he would text me saying ‘Im with my girlfriend, I can’t talk now, ill message you later’ – OMG this would annoy the hell out of me. – I would get really stroppy with him. I swear it must have been like he had 2 girlfriends! – Bless him.

Whenever he messaged me I would always have a smile/smirk on my face. Back in the day, when I was at school I would hide my phone under the desk and text him back – All my friends knew who I was texting because of my face. I used to get that girly feeling all the time.

Anyway he was my best friend (still is) throughout all my school years. He was that guy that I would fall asleep texting and wake up eagerly looking to see if he has messaged back. I would tell him anything and everything. He went through all my break ups with other guys, getting our exam results and everything!

From the first day I met him I fell. I knew that he was someone special. He had blonde spiked up hair, was smaller than me, wearing a football shirt, shorts and socks all pulled up. Now yes his fashion sense back then sounds a little out there but he was super cute! He had a 6 pack and everything! (Not so much now but that’s because we have become so comfortable together). I would always look at him and go all red in the face. He walked me home once (It was around a 40 minute walk), I was so nervous and honestly when he hugged me I thought my knees were going to fall from under me. – We actually didn’t physically see each other for years, however spoke every single day. We spoke on MSN, Facebook, Skype and also by texting. We would stay up to 2AM talking, it was never boring. We would be talking all day and still never get bored.

When we started meeting up again (we must have been around 17) – He had just passed his driving test (Finally! Took him a few times with his theory!). I was single and so was he, this was unheard of! We had never both been single at the same time. I was so nervous, I never understood why, I mean I spoke to this guy every day for so many years but now I was meeting him for the first time in years and it all felt real all of a sudden. He knocked on my door, my heart stopped. When I opened the door, I had to remind myself to breathe, here was my bestfriend, 6ft 2in (so much taller than I remembered), hair swept back (no more blonde), gorgeous green eyes, goofy smile. This was no longer the boy that I remembered, he had turned into this handsome man. – It was so weird, I mean, I had seen him all the time on Facebook and Skype however seeing him standing in front of me, it was like I was seeing him for the first time. – I thought that he was the most handsome guy I had ever seen.

Long story short, we started dating around 3 months after meeting up again. It just felt natural. Like nothing had changed. The first time we kissed, OMG it was like fireworks set off in my mind. It was like nothing I had ever experienced before. (Even as I write this I can’t help but smile). – He was so nervous and I was so nervous as well. I mean the atmosphere went completely tense, my heart was in my throat. Being honest, I had waited for this day since I had first met him.

He literally does anything for me. Anything. He takes care of me, one time I was so sick and the week before I fell in love with a little elephant teddy. He came over with the elephant teddy and a bunch of chocolate to make me feel better. I will point out that elephants are my favourite animal. Heffalumps are adorable. He is always looking after me. Especially with what I’m going through at the moment, he is the only one that I will listen too when in my lowest moments. He is the only I want to calm me down. He doesn’t necessarily have to do anything, but he grabs me in his arms and holds me. This is enough to calm me. I can’t explain how it makes me feel just to be in his arms. I guess the only way I can explain it is, I feel safe.

He is honestly the most amazing human being I’ve ever met. He is so kind, caring, lovely, soppy, everything you could ever want. I can’t name enough words to describe him.

I’m lucky to call him my bestfriend, my boyfriend, my fairytale. – My Knight in shining armour.

Much Love,

The Insider x