If you could have a super power, what one would you have?!

You know Insiders, I have always had this question in my head. I have never been able to distinctively say which superpower I would like. There is just way too many to pick from!

  • Invisibility
  • Flying
  • Super Human Strength
  • Breathing Under Water
  • Mind Control

I just wouldn’t know what to pick. These are clearly the common ones however then you need to take into consideration the elements as well. – Earth, Water, Fire and Air.

I remember at one stage of my life, I would’ve loved to have the power of invisibility. Mainly because I wished that no one could see me. I just wanted to blend in and wanted no one to see my face, my body or even the person that I was.

Another stage of my life, I would’ve loved to have mind control, so I could control the way people thought about me. To be able to understand or know exactly what others thought about me. Although, the thought of this now, terrifies me. I mean, come on who would wan to know the truth about what others thought about you. Could end up being super harsh and hurtful.

I would’ve loved to fly at one point as well. Especially, when I had just passed my driving test and needing to drive to work every day. I HATE traffic. I love driving fast and obviously in 9-5 traffic this is completely out of the question. I have an amazing car that isn’t rather nippy and I’m not able to use it. – FRUSTRATING. Crawling to work at 20mph isn’t the best thing. Imagine being able to fly. Fly as high as the sky. Up there with the planes and the birds feeling completely free. – This all sounds amazing, until I came to the realisation that I’m afraid of heights.

I’m sure that we all remember those walks to school as a child. Insiders, you know the ones. The ones in the winter, when it’s so cold your nose is red raw, your finger tips numb with frost bite. When it was so cold you could see your breath when you blew out. I’m sure I’m not the only one, that thought I had the super power of Ice. I used to think I was some kind of Ice Princess and that my powers were just growing. – How silly! I would exhale and think that i was going to freeze someone. i mean come on i get  a 10/10 for imagination.

I have finally settled with my superpower. – I MAKE PROSECCO DISAPPEAR.

No word of a lie. I’m magic, I make it completely disappear. How amazing is that? – I end up being able to gear the prosecco talking to me once its gone.

Anyway, Insiders, I can hear it calling me now!

Have an AMAZING saturday evening!

Much Love,

The Insider x


Stay Out..

I was sitting in my kitchen today, looking out of the long glass windows. It’s so peaceful. Then movement catches my eye. It’s the next door neighbours cat.

Now I love animals. All animals. However my mum is having a massive war with the cats. My mum is a keen gardener and so is my step dad. They are always out in the garden, looking after all of the plants and grass. My step dad will be out there rain or shine cutting the grass. My mum will also be out there on her hands and knees pruning the flower beds.

We have never had a problem with cats in the garden, until recently. They have taken a liking to pooing in the garden. Yes, pooing. – I think its hilarious. My mum doesn’t. ‘They are pooing everywhere! Why don’t they poo in their own garden’ my mum would say.

Honestly they would poo in every inch of the garden. It’s a little disgusting, considering cats usually bury their poo, these ones don’t. They literally just poo smack bang in the middle of the grass and run off.

My mum was getting to her breaking point. One day when I got home from work, I could hear this amazingly high-pitched siren. I shouted through the door, ‘mum! Whats that bloody sound?’ – She looked up at me smiling away, ‘How can you hear that? Its to keep the cats away! – They don’t like the sound of the high-pitched sound’. ‘Of course I can hear it! It’s stupidly loud!’

She walked out into the garden and started putting these little devices within the flower beds. Walking back into the house with a smile on her face, she said ‘That will keep the cats out of the garden’ – It’s as though she is at war with these little kittens from next door. It made me think of Tom and Jerry. You know, Tom would always be trying and scheming to capture Jerry and Jerry would always be out-smarting Tom. Its kinda like that. My mum being Tom and the kittens being Jerry.

However I think my mum has had the last laugh now. Not only had she put these weird sirens out in the garden that are so high-pitched the cats can hear them. She had also read on the internet that if you put cocktail sticks in the flower beds as well it stops the cats from pooing as well. – I must admit this actually made me howl with laughter. ‘Are you trying to hurt these cats?’ I said to my mum. Her response was ‘No, it’s just to stop them from pooing in the garden! – It won’t hurt them it’ll only prick them’. It’s the most funniest thing I’ve ever heard. – I feel sorry for the cats if they try and sit down for a poo.

Mum 1 – Cats 0.

Watching out the window today has confirmed that the cats won’t come off the fence. They stay high and off the grass. They seem to just retreat back to their own house.

It’s SO funny. – Whats your opinion of Cats?

Much Love,

The Insider x

But first COFFEE!

How do people do this?!

This is my first early shift in months. And I have to say …. ITS KILLING ME! – Why on earth would people like having early shifts?!

I would much rather have my 12pm-8pm shifts! They are much more appealing! I mean come on Insiders, I get a lay in till 9:00-9:30! I miss all the morning and evening traffic! What could be more better?

I know, I know! You get to leave earlier and you have the evening to do things. What about the tiredness? What about the early nights? No lay ins?! This is killing me!

I can honestly say that I’m being run on coffee today. I must’ve drank my whole body weight in coffee. I wouldn’t have survived without it. – THANK GOD WE GET FREE COFFEE!

The free coffee isn’t like Starbucks or Costa but it does the job. I mean we have a Starbucks and Costa in the building and it’s slightly reduced prices, however the coffee machine is just so much closure! – Plus free.

Not to mention we had lunch at 1pm. I’m used to only being at work for an hour by 1pm, not even thinking about eating. I just wasnt hungry at all. my body was telling me that I didn’t need food until around 3:30pm-4:00pm.

I honestly couldn’t wait to get home and put my slippers on and sleep. – I sound like a right oldie.

Never again..

Much Love,

The Insider x

The Talk

I’m sitting in my car at this very moment in time. I’m working up the mental ability to get myself out of the car and into work.

I know all of us lack the motivation to go to work. I know for me, it’s not necessarily that I don’t want to go it’s more the fact I have this huge butterfly/nervousness/emptiness feeling in the bottom of my stomach.

Fear. Yes that’s what I’m going to call it. Fear. Sounds a little weird and silly doesn’t it? I’ve been in this job for over 2 years now (pretty much known as a veteran) yet I feel fear? – So many thoughts go round in my head, so many questions.

– What am I going to do wrong today?

– What is going to happen today?

– Will I get in trouble today?

– Am I going to be late?

These are all very silly questions, yet this is my daily routine. I promise all of you Insiders, this is what I feel on a daily basis. – Horrible or what?

Right. It’s time to have a talk with myself. Time to reassure myself. I CAN do this. Don’t be anxious. Your an hour and a half early! I know I’m GOOD at my job. People DO like me. You look BEAUTIFUL. Take a deep breath – YOU GOT THIS!

I’ll see you Insiders later!

Much Love,

The Insider x


Evening Insiders, 

Annoyingly I’m sick. Honestly I hate being sick.

It’s a mixture of emotions. My anxiety builds up as I have to call into work and say that I’m not able to go in. The very thought of this freaks me out and I can feel my heart in my throat. I hate not going to work – Yes, some may say that I’m a workaholic, or that I live to work. All of this isn’t necessarily correct. I’m just terrified of being in trouble and I see that not going into work as me going to be getting in trouble – Stupid I know. However, the more time you have off work for being sick this can eventually get you in trouble with work. I have seen people be in trouble for having so much sick time. – Being rational about it all, I this is actually the 1st maybe 2nd day that I’ve had off in 2 years for being sick. So I guess you could say I’m safe and won’t be in trouble. Still this doesn’t stop me feeling that way. 

At the end of the day I just don’t have the time to be sick. I’ve got so much work going on at the moment, all amazingly GOOD things, which take a lot of energy and a lot of my time. Having a day off sick today was super annoying.  I had so much booked in, in my calendar. Which I’m going to have to catch up on tomorrow. On top of a long stressful day as it is! – UGH. 

This was the feelings that I had this morning. I was getting up, doing my make up, getting ready for work. Then all of a sudden my stomach felt like it was going to explode. In the night I had been tossing and turning with a bad stomach however when I woke I felt fine. Then BAM, I had just finished an amazing smokey eye look (I was very proud of), when I just had such a huge urge to go to the toilet. – Yupp. The toilet was my bestfriend for the whole day. 

Everyone seems to be getting sick at the moment, we are all dropping like flies! Especially in an office job which I’m in, with the ventilation and closeness with others, as soon as one person sniffs everyone’s sick. It’s rather disgusting and annoying. I often think that we should all go to work with the medical masks on like the Chinese/Japanese do due to pollution. (NO OFFENCE INTENDED IN THAT STATEMENT). There is the odd person (like me) that will never admit they are sick and will push through it. However, us strong people who do this, end up looking like living zombies! 

I was SO annoyed. I mean girls, you must know how hard it is to get the right angle and shade of a smokey eye. I had perfected it. Then my stupid stomach was like NOPE, NO ONE IS GOING TO SEE THIS MASTER PIECE TODAY. 

After what must have been an hour on the toilet, I tried calling my work, to say to them I wasn’t going to be able to make it into work. I think I must have tried 8 times to call into work between 10am -12pm. No one seemed to answer. Whenever I’m at work, I aways see the absence phone in a managers hand and they answer it within seconds. When I call, this doesn’t happen. It was tedious! I then had to tell my bestie that I wasn’t coming in and had to ask her to tell my manager. It was hard, to call at a time where I wasn’t on the toilet. – Thankfully she told one of my friends that a manager. 

I knew that my manager would end up ringing me throughout the day to ensure that I was ok and basically to check up and collaborate my story of being sick and not partying. – Which I can assure you, I was glued to the toilet all day. I knew that his cal would be occurring as soon as he was told about me not coming in. What if I was on the toilet? – I mean how embarrassing would that have been? Imagine speaking to your manager when your on the toilet. I think I would have died in a fit of embarrassment. I wouldn’t ever be able to live that kind of thing down. – Whenever you’re in the bathroom, either in the shower, in the bath or on the toilet, somehow everyone seems to know! There is clearly an echo that is very distinctive and linked to a bathroom. When I call my boyfriend on the way home from work, I’m always, ALWAYS able to tell when he’s poopin. (God if he reads this he will NOT be happy!). 

Anyway I can confirm to all of you Insiders that my boss didn’t call me when I was on the toilet, I was actually in bed sleeping. I mean I had just managed to drift off into a deep sleep and he called me! Typical! – How inconsiderate of him? I actually didn’t wake up quick enough to catch the phone call. I had to call back on the number and talk to him. I actually told him off for waking me up! He apologised a lot and told me to go back to sleep and rest. – Bless him. 

I’m feeling a lot better after, 4 hours on the toilet, 3 naps and a long old soak in the bath. – Very much ready for a LONG and BUSY work tomorrow! 

Early night for me Insiders!

Much Love, 

The Insider x 

4 Years!

Well Insiders,

I don’t know how my boyfriend has done it. However we have reached the bench mark of 4 years! How AMAZING is that?! Its crazy! It really doesn’t feel as though its been as long as that! – I guess thats a good thing.

Im sure I’ve mentioned previously that we’ve been best friends for like 8 years now. Half of that time we have been together! I can honestly say that I don’t know what I would do without him in my life. He’s always been there for me, especially now that I’m going through all this emotional sh**. He’s not been scared off at all, when most would. He’s an amazing human being.

Our anniversary is smack bang in the middle of January. This is a little annoying as we have just had Christmas and our employer pays early in December for late Christmas shopping. This is great but means everyone is living on rations for the rest of the month until January pay day. SO LONG. Anyway, with our anniversary being in the middle of January it means that we decide to have a lovely, cozy day/night in.

This year was by far the best anniversary for me. – No, no ring Insiders, I bet thats what all of you were thinking, but nope, not yet! You’ll all be the first to know when that happens! I’ll tell you what though! It’s super annoying when people ask how long me and my boyfriend have been together and everyone says ‘Ooh, no ring yet?!’ – I just want to scream in their faces, ‘NO and it doesn’t matter! A ring doesn’t mean he loves me any less! – Not to mention we are only just into our 20s!’. Its crazy how so many people think its important to have a ring to just symbolise their love. Im definitely not against marriage or anything like that – I’d be thrilled however, I think its rude saying that kind of thing to others when you don’t know what their situation is or if they are even ready.. 

Anyway… Mini rant over…

We had both booked the day off work and had the whole day together watching Disney films. I made him breakfast, which wasn’t a total disaster. The fire alarm went off but other than that it went off without a hitch! – We then retired to the snug and watched LOADS of Disney films, with chocolates/sweets. I know, I know, how old are we? I believe that your never to old for Disney! No matter how old you are, you’ll always be able to be cheered up by a Disney/Pixar film. – If you don’t agree, you can bibbidi bobbidi back hell off my blog (just kidding or am I….?!). He then went to make dinner – My favourite! Sausage, mash and beans. YUM!! – this wasn’t a romantic dinner, as it did get crashed by my mum and dad. THANKS GUYS! (not). 

We both agreed on no presents this year as we were both struggling for money after Christmas. All we said was cards. I’m not going to lie, cards are my favourite part of any celebration. My boyfriend is the soppiest person in the world and writes the most amazing things to me. All about how much he loves me. To me, this means more than any present as he has spent time to think and write lovely things to me. – Such a CUTIE!

Gosh I LOVE HIM. – I’d be so lost without him.

Much Love,

The Insider x